The awkwardness of getting old.

Yesterday was our last detachment dining out and let me tell you, the whole night was filled with awkwardness. First of all, I went over to my older sister's house to get my hair and makeup done and...she found a WHITE HAIR. Actually, it was brown, gray and white combined. I saved it in a plastic bag - you heard me right - because it symbolizes just how much older I am getting. I may be just twenty-one but my life is completely different than it was when I was seventeen. I guess that gray-white hair is telling me that those glory days are going to be over. First comes love, then comes marriage, a-yada-yada-yada, no more being young!

Other than all of the awkwardness that took place beforehand, Dining Out was beautiful and so much fun. The Colonel even took a drink from the Grog bowl! Can you believe that? It was the first time in the detachment's history.


We also had a guest speaker, a Colonel who was an F-16 pilot. I could feel the tension when I looked in Lieutenant's eyes. He was staring at the man he wanted to be, it was like looking in the future of how he had always wanted his life to play out. When he asked Lieutenant about the job he got, he could tell that Lieutenant was holding back just how crushed he was. The Colonel looked him in the eye and said "Don't give up." Three simple words that meant so much.

Lieutenant feels like he is losing everything he ever wanted to be. Since seven years old, he's wanted to make a difference in the skies. He is afraid that will never happen now. I don't know what to say to him to make things better. If I could, I'd give him the world. I love him and I hate seeing him so depressed. I just don't know how to make this right.